Friday, April 08, 2005

Wal-Mart Baghdad to Sell Plastic Jesuses

Please kill Kenny, cause he wouldn't want to see this.....

Rumor has it that the Walton family has invested millions of dollars in GOP accounts to secure a 75-acre Persian Headquarters in the heart of Baghdad, with an attached Wal-Mosque Super Store perfect for future shoppers.
“Once these al-Salabis, Chalabis, and Wannabis get a taste of our shopping extravaganzas, prices are going to roll back like heads did in the darkest days of Saddam,” exclaimed Joe Walton, the little-known favorite cousin who was the model for the yellow happy face that knocks prices down to their knees in the new Iraqi ads scheduled to air on al-Jazeera.

“And frankly, we’re not going to get any complaints about say, $15 a day for floor workers out here, or wimmin’s lib or any of that bull crap. Not here. Those Mideast Mexicans sure know how to work! The more hours in the day, the better! It’s an employer’s market, and that gives us the sharpest cutting edge over the neck of the competition. Well, if there were any competition, that is, but whatever. Yee-ha! It works for me. Thanks, Georgie!”

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